WITH HEART AND GRATITUDE TO STEVE JOBS

You’re reading me now, because of Steve Jobs. I honestly haven’t had much luck, with men named “Steve”; this one, though, changed my life. I love him now, knowing, sadly, that, though we never met, he singlehandedly improved the Quality of my Life exponentially, and JUST MAY HAVE SAVED IT.

My late Grandpa Ike used to be horrified, that I was NOT a competitive person. I’d beat him at cards, he was a sore loser; I simply enjoyed the game, the journey. So it is, too, with writing: Dick Kubick, the former Press Coordinator for my beloved Wilmington College, told me I’d NEVER make it in the publishing realm, because I wasn’t willing to put my work above everyone elses.

Steve Jobs made this webpage possible: Now, my writing and being read is more like playing golf: After MY BEST, only as good as my last effort, but UNIQUELY MINE, only in competition with that Past Self.

Estranged from two daughters, it was THEY, who gave me the nickname “QtrAcreGal”; while waiting for hurts, aging and misperceptions to all change, they and I are aware, even at a distance, of EACH OTHER. Their Facebook pages are enough to make ANY PARENT cringe, while I do my best to make sure any voyeuring they do HERE shows a Mom, a person THEY CAN BE PROUD OF.

We are lighthouses to one another…stars in parallel universes. Steve Jobs MADE SUCH POSSIBLE.

Wrapped up, as I was, in my own little world last night, I went to a prayer meeting in my small town. Full of people who had taught me about faith and destiny, reaching for my Highest Self and the Highest Good attainable, I chatted, argued, and walked away with no answers, but ok with such.

Across from the parking lot where the meeting was held, there’s a fountain on a small river: My late Grandma Lil was President of the Garden Club, at the time they built it, so it means QUITE A LOT.

Walking toward the fountain, I noticed it was dark as I, one-handed, turned my cell phone on: Sounds cacophonous emanated from it…I looked to see what was wrong….

and then, I looked for Steve in the stars.

Hearing about how Jobs failed to finish college…about how irascible he could be? It reminded me of me. Even as I write this, a challenge I made to the pastor presiding over the prayer meeting I attended has resulted in my OWN social skills being called into question.

Matthew 13.57 (where Jesus indicates prophets ARE NOT appreciated in their own homes and lands) soothes me now. As Job was a Buddhist, perhaps he chose another path, that led HIM to peace with similar struggles.

Steves advice about being AUTHENTICALLY ONESELF, in his Commencement Speech to Stanford graduates years ago has me being content with myself now. I can’t BE anyone else, and, even when I UPSET OTHERS, those I do HAVE NEVER disputed a certain level of sophisticated creative intelligence and talent in me.

Wierd, to be born this way…and if Steve is any indication, well, I LOVE the company I keep, the club of Ne’er Do Wells I apparently am a part of.

In closing, I will admit, I NEVER was attracted to skinny guys. Wozniak was always more my “cuddly genius” type, but, looking back, has always been more socially acceptable, less driven, clueless or alone.

I realize now, as a South Carolina vet friend pointed out, I TRULY DON’T need a large quantity of followers and loved ones. Like Jobs, what I DO HAVE is sweet…I love them all SO MUCH…

Perhaps in NOT focusing on building a large fan club, I, LIKE JOBS, WILL GET ONE.

Sooo…here I am, CRYING ALL OVER MY KEYBOARD. It’s a good cry, over someone so succulent. True Honesty requires the Courage of the Heavens, it seems

This is the gift a stranger named Steve Jobs leaves me with…and with which, I’ll run.

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